There are some exceptionally matter-of-reality, (some may say) antiquated things that young ladies like. It is vital to know these nuts and bolts, in order to pull in the protest of your love.
There are guys who are naturally suave and can get any girl they wish to fall for them. And then there are guys who have no clue about what to do when the object of their affection is in front of them. Assuming you’re from the latter lot, here’s a piece of advice for you. Don’t panic! First, you’re not the only guy out there who gets tongue-tied when he likes a girl. Second, it’s a perfectly natural reaction to get nervous when she’s around, especially if she has no clue about your feelings.
Make Sure She Knows You Exist
A girl will not give you a second glance if she can’t…well…see you. So, make yourself visible to her. We don’t mean wear neon, we mean do simple things to get her attention. Things like smiling, saying a polite hello, holding the door open for her may seem inconsequential, but these are the things that girls do notice. Find excuses to be around her (not in a stalkerish way though). If you happen to have common friends, get them to introduce the two of you and take it from there.
Look Presentable, Always
OK. So she knows who you are. You guys hang out with a bunch of friends now and then. How can you make her pay attention to you? For starters, dress well. Boys, we know dressing up isn’t on your priority list always, but if you want to make a good impression on this girl you’re sweet on, kindly take the effort to make yourself worth looking at. Take the time to pick out good clothes. They don’t have to be over-the-top expensive designer wear, they just have to fit right and make you look decent.
Pay attention to your hair. Whatever look you’re going for, please complete it. Don’t wear the best clothes and then not wear socks with your sneakers! Yes, girls do notice such things and the tiniest faux pas can alter her perception about you. Always smell good. Girls love guys who smell good. It’s the first thing that attracts them towards you, physically at least. That being said, don’t douse yourself in perfume or cologne. Know when to stop spraying, you don’t want to give her a headache.
Be Well-mannered and Confident
The world says girls like only bad boys. We say girls like guys who treat them nice. Girls like guys who walk on the traffic side of the road, who play with their pets, who respect elders. Girls like guys who will keep the swearing for when they’re with the other guys. Most of all, girls like guys who are confident. So, no matter how nervous you get when she’s around, muster up the courage to at least appear confident in front of her. When you’re confident, it reflects in your disposition.
You must have heard people telling you to be yourself time and again. Here’s the deal: it works. When you’re being yourself, you don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not. There’s no one who can be a better YOU than YOU. So, use yourself to your advantage and see how confident you can be.
Don’t Just Listen, Talk
True: Girls (almost) always have something to talk about.
Also True: Girls like guys who are good listeners.
False: Girls like guys who are only good listeners.
It may be indisputable that girls can go on and on about the tiniest or the biggest of things. But then that’s true even about guys. The misconception is that girls want guys to only listen. The fact of the matter is that, a girl wants to talk to someone who can give the appropriate responses and ensure that the conversation keeps going.
So the next time she talks, listen. Get to know things about her. What she likes and dislikes. What her hobbies and interests are. This way, when she talks about something she’s passionate about, you know what it’s about and can continue talking. You can contribute to a conversation that she’ll definitely not forget, rather than just smiling and nodding intermittently as half the world expects you to.
Give Her a Daily Odd Compliment
Girls love compliments, that’s not news to anyone. What guys sometimes misconstrue this as is that girls love compliments about the way they look. Think about it. She’s pretty: you know it, she knows it. She’s probably heard it from ten other people already. So what can you do? Go beyond her physical being. Compliment her about her creativity.
Admire her patience as she explains a math problem to someone. Tell her how nice it is of her to confirm that all her friends reached home safe after a late night together. Tell her how well she plays the guitar. These are the things girls want appreciated. When you’re complimenting her, be careful not to extol her like she’s a goddess of sorts. She’ll probably just get creeped out and not talk to you again.
Observe the Niceties
When trying to get a girl to like you, this is one thing you just can’t escape. No matter how cliché being nice is, you’ve still got to do it. We’re not talking expensive gifts and promises of the moon. We’re talking simple, yet meaningful gestures that will touch her heart. Remember her birthday. Go one step ahead, remember her family’s birthdays. It will only help your case to get to know her as well as you can, and surprise her with these observations now and then.
Help her whenever she asks for it, and sometimes even when she doesn’t. Remember what her favorite flavor of ice-cream is. Find out what’s her pet peeve. You’re looking at this girl as your prospective girlfriend, as a person you want to have a relationship with.
Be the ‘Friend’ Her Friends Love
There’s an unwritten rule among girls: if I don’t like the guy you’re considering dating, don’t date him. And while there may be exceptions to this rule (just like any other), the importance of a BFF’s approval of a boy in a girl’s love life cannot be ignored. So, here’s the trick: get the friends on your side first. Be extremely nice to them. Help them whenever they need something. Be friendly and fun around them. Be the guy they’ll WANT their friend to be with.
When the girl in question sees what a great and fun person you are to be around, she’ll want a piece of the cake too. And you’ll have a special piece for her, won’t you? *wink wink* Be nice to her friends and they’re likely to put in a good word for you, knowingly or unknowingly. This way, even if it doesn’t work out with her, you can’t have too many friends, can you?
Make Her Laugh
Guys constantly underestimate the importance girls attach to a good sense of humor. A good sense of humor is interpreted as intelligence by most girls. So, make her laugh, make her laugh hard. Smart, witty, dry, sarcastic, goofy: employ any kind of funny you can to impress her. We know it’s not possible for everyone to have the flair of a stand-up comedian and be spontaneous, so it is important to be prepared.
Avoid being sexist. She’ll laugh off a couple jokes, but you must know when to stop. Else you’ll be a labeled ‘that sexist jerk’, a tag that is not very easy to get rid of. Body parts are not to meant to be joked about. Period. Girls generally do not appreciate jokes made about anyone’s body or appearance. Ridiculing other people to make her laugh is not the right way to go about it. If being mean to someone else is the only way you can be funny, please find another way to make Her laugh. Unless insensitive-jerk-who-needs-to-demean-others-to-get-a-laugh is what you’re aiming for.
Flirt with Class
You’ve got to bring in that extra zing to let her know that you have more than friendship on your mind. Flirt: it’s the only way to avoid being stuck in the dreaded ‘friend zone’. But be classy and subtle about it. Tease her with hints here and there so that she knows that you have a romantic interest in her. For instance, if she thanks you for something that you did for her, say something like, “Anything for you sweetheart.” It’s cheesy but it gets the job done.
Physical contact is another important tool to make her aware that you’re attracted to her. But be very very subtle about this. A girl will judge in an instant whether she’s OK with you touching her or not. So you’ve got to be really cautious. Touching her elbow while crossing the street, helping her put on her coat, putting your arm around her shoulders when she’s upset; these are all safe. Maintain a proper distance, give her hints, and let her take it from there. If she likes you back, she will.
You may read page after page about getting a girl to like you, but you’ve got to be prepared for heartbreak as well. The tips given here are just generic ones on what girls generally tend to like. Every girl is different. What may make one’s heart melt may make another’s skin crawl. At the end of the day, all you can do is be true to yourself and to her. The rest will fall into place, if it has to.